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7 Self-Reflection Questions to Help You Create Your Own Happiness this Year

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7 Self-Reflection Questions to Help You Create Your Own Happiness this Year


“Self-reflection is necessary to dig beneath our own layers and visit the inner crevices of our heart and mind to develop an understanding of life.” ~Unknown

This year, I’ve not set New Year’s resolutions nor planned to completely “reinvent” myself or my life.

Over the past three years, many issues have risen, emotions needing to be released, and wounds needing to heal. It’s been quite a rollercoaster ride, and I want to be gentle with myself.

Instead of making resolutions, I took a simple moleskin notebook and began to think about how to create my own happiness in the new year.

I’d like to share bits of this process with you—seven questions—to help you achieve the same in your life. Because, let’s face it, we deserve it!

Grab your notebook or any other type of notebook, a cup coffee, and reflect on your life.

1. What do you consider meaningful?

Or, to put it another way, what is your life worth right now? I say “right now” because it can change over time.

The other day my mom and I were reflecting back on the past three year’s and discussing how certain aspects have lost their meaning and importance while others have become vital.

Conversation topics, activities and relationships are no longer satisfying. As we talked, we realized we’ve been grieving them quite painfully for the past couple of years.

For example, I’ve become more sensitive, and shallow relationships don’t satisfy me anymore. I seek deep, honest conversations and meaningful connections. I prefer to be quiet and spend more time contemplating.

While change can be hard, it is always a way to open new doors. It’s not that nothing has meaning anymore, But they are not the same thing, and it’s to us to find what those are.

So, What do you find meaningful right now? It is important to nurture it

2. What’s your most critical need?

Last year, I discovered the importance in regularly identifying and addressing unmet need as a form self-care. So, after experiencing mild to moderate feelings of depression for several months—and finding comfort in neither meditation nor bubble baths (nor red wine)—I dug deeper to discover the source of my unhappiness.

The search began with a question: “What do I need (really) right now?”

That was when I realized that I craved laughter and social connection. After realizing it, I began to take the steps necessary to satisfy those needs. Soon I felt better.

 What’s your most critical need?

Once you’ve identified it, you could ask yourself, “What’s preventing me from meeting that need today? And how could I start attending to it?”

3. What would your year look like?

In the end, we’re all seeking to feel good. “Good” can come in many flavors, like at peace, alive, or loved. Your favorite flavor may change from day to day, but there’s likely one feeling you crave more than others in this season of your life.

What is it?

My spirit is playful. I’ve been too serious for too long, and my soul is calling for a good laugh.

How about you?

Once you’ve identified your top one to three feelings, you may ask yourself, “When do I tend to feel that way?” Consider the past week, month and years and think about the times you felt those emotions. These moments, or similar ones, should be repeated more often.

4. What are your top 3 priorities for this year?

Greg McKeown wrote the in Essentialism, “If you don’t prioritize your life, someone else will.”

Essentialism, as described in the book, is to do fewer things—the most important ones—and do them better. Less in quantity, more in quality.

It’s about being clear on your priorities and designing your life around them. This will help you feel happier and more at ease with your life. You also experience less stress and overwhelm because your life isn’t cluttered with activities that drain your energy.

Decide where you will focus your energy and attention this year. You should only think about one or three aspects of your daily life.

If you have difficulty identifying your priorities, another question I ask myself every few months is, “If my life came to an end right now, what would I regret not having done, experienced, accomplished, and become?”

Almost every time I reflect on this question, the first answer to arise is “not having attained a higher level of consciousness.” And every time, it reminds me to make more room in my schedule for my spiritual practice rather than filling it up with work. It helps me prioritize.

5. Which are your top 3 goals?

Because I didn’t want to set clear goals, it made me more anxious than excited. ‘That’s until I realized I was going in circles.

From my mid-thirties onwards, year after year I found myself back in the same spot I was last year, particularly with my creative projects. I wasn’t making any progress, and it got frustrating.

I finally understood the value of setting goals. It gives your mind a clear direction. It helps us stay focused and prevents us from getting sidetracked and distracted.

As Yogi Berra famously said, “If you don’t know where you are going, you’ll end up someplace else.”

It is difficult to achieve too many goals. This can lead to overwhelming and stressful feelings. I believe that three main goals, along with a few smaller ones, is sufficient.

So, What are your top three goals for the year?

6. What are three actions you’ll take to achieve each of these goals?

That’s the most practical question of the lot, and it invites us to be proactive and think of how we can start tackling those goals.

I’m very “Vata”—the creative personality type of Ayurveda. Vata It can be irritable, is easily distracted, and has a tendency to change its mind. It seeks out all avenues and ends up going nowhere.

Defining my priorities, setting goals, and defining three actions to start accomplishing those goals helps me stay focused on what matters and avoid wasting time and energy on what doesn’t. Plus, clarity reduces stress, and it’s a powerful antidote to procrastination. You’re more likely to do something if it’s clear in your mind.

What are the three steps you will take to achieve your goals this year?

7. What are twelve things you’d like to explore, learn, or try?

Every year, I choose twelve experiments—things I’m curious to try and explore—one for each month. I started this project a few decades ago when my life felt a bit boring and lacking inspiration.

So far, I have attended a cacao ceremony, had a reading with a medium, tried Deepak Chopra’s 21-Day Abundance Meditation challenge, participated in a laughter yoga class, tried ecstatic dancing, had a Quantum Healing Hypnosis session, and experimented with a bunch of other things.

Experimenting is a great way for you to discover new interests and passions. It also allows you to meet new people and uncover aspects of yourself—like desires and personality traits—that you didn’t even know existed. It enriches your life!

Pick twelve experiments, and then assign each one to a month in the year. Then, after each experiment, ask yourself, “Did I like it? Do I want to do it again?”

I hope you’ll find value in some of these ideas and that they’ll inspire you to create your own happiness.

This year, may you have the opportunity to experience the life you long for.

For the next 7 days, you can get Emilie’s course, Science-Based Creative Visualization, In the Best Life Bundle: Best You!. Through this program you’ll learn the most effective method to transcend your limiting beliefs and insecurities and stop self-sabotaging, playing small, and feeling stuck.

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About Emilie Pelletier

Emilie is a life coach and spiritual entrepreneur. She helps people get clear on their purpose, do their life’s work, and pursue their goals and dreams with clarity and confidence. You can get her FREE tools—The Soulful Bucket List Journal, The Blissipline Journal for Daily Happiness?, and The Life Purpose Formula: Clarify Your Purpose and Calling—or connect with her through her website.

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Tiny Buddha’s first article, 7 Self-Reflection Questions to Create Your Happiness This Year, appeared first on Tiny Buddha.



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